


Fumbling Firsts

by meloncitrus (grandmelon)



Series: SouRin Summer Fest 2018 [2]
Category: Free!
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Established Relationship, First Time, Fluff, M/M, Top!Rin, bottom!sousuke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 04:21:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15502203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grandmelon/pseuds/meloncitrus
Summary: Week/Prompt: 1/First TimeFirst times don't always go as planned, but that doesn't mean they're always bad.





	Fumbling Firsts

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy these awkward boys!

“Ouch,” Rin hissed, squirming when Sousuke pulled his fingers back out as gently as possible. Their first time was nothing short of awful and embarrassing. It was a complete mess, and Rin was growing more frustrated and upset by the second.

 

Having their first time wasn’t something they hadn’t been preparing for, but Rin could never quite relax enough to prepare himself. Even with Sousuke trying to work him open it was painful and awkward, spending nearly a half hour on absolutely nothing, in Rin’s opinion. At that point Rin was hiding his dick against the bed to make sure the other hadn’t noticed he had ceased to be hard for the past fifteen minutes.

 

Tensing when he heard the deep sigh behind him Rin sat up but didn’t dare to turn around to face his boyfriend. His eyes began to water as he thought about how he was ruining everything for them, but before he could continue his spiral into self-loathing he was pulled back against Sousuke, sitting in his lap. Rin flushed, embarrassment overwritten with disappointment in himself when he felt Sousuke’s flaccid member against his back.

 

“Sorry,” Rin mumbled, wrapping his arms around the tan ones holding him. He shivered when he felt Sousuke hum against his neck.

 

“For what?”

 

“For being so bad at this,” Rin said, staring at the wall, determined to keep it together. “For ruining our first time.”

 

“You’re not ruining anything, and it’s not like either of us know what we’re doing,” Sousuke said, resting his chin against Rin’s shoulder. “You’re too stressed about this being perfect.”

 

Rin didn’t say anything, unable to deny that he had been stressing about this night since their very first talk about it. Rin leaned back into Sousuke’s chest, warm, comforting. He took a deep breath and tried to ease the tension in his shoulders and remind himself that everything was okay. That Sousuke didn’t mind if things weren’t perfect. That he wouldn’t hate him for messing things up.

 

“So, what do you want to do? Continue? Stop?” Sousuke asked, nuzzling his head against Rin’s. Rin shrugged a little and sighed again.

 

“I’d like to continue, but this isn’t working how I’d planned. Maybe we should just give up on this today.”

 

“Why don’t you let me take over for a bit then,” Sousuke said. After a second Rin gave a jerky nod and Sousuke scooted them back until he was against the pillows and headrest, letting Rin settle into him. Rin let Sousuke do as he pleased, watching the hands once holding him now roam freely over his skin, caressing his sides. His arms settled on the thighs encasing him, smiling at the kisses along his neck as he was given an impromptu massage.

 

He was reduced to nothing, legs becoming jelly, arms heavy, mind focused only on where hot calloused hands touched his skin, leaving burning trails in their wake. The more time passed, the more mischievous those hands got. Dipping lower, grabbing the inside of Rin’s thighs, kneading at his hips. Soon enough a warm tingling sensation ran through him, biting the back of his hand as Sousuke teased.

 

“Ah,” Rin moaned, arching into Sousuke’s hand when the other brushed his knuckles along his shaft. He heard a sharp intake of breath behind him, the other shifting against him. He heard the snap of the bottle cap before Sousuke grabbed hold of Rin’s member, growing harder with each second. Rin trembled, pulling his legs up when Sousuke started to pump him, hand cool and slick with lube.

 

He felt Sousuke’s dick against his back, hard and trapped between them. Giving it an experimental grind, he smirked when he heard Sousuke curse. His victory was short lived, flushing as he felt Sousuke’s fingers slide along the space just below his balls. He tensed a second, toes curling when Sousuke thumbed the head of his dick, starting a sloppy trail of kisses along his shoulder and up his neck. Rin went to pump himself, feeling his hole give way to the uncomfortable pressure, taking in Sousuke’s fingers with a little less resistance than earlier.

 

Rin let his head fall back against Sousuke’s shoulder, enjoying the feeling of Sousuke’s mouth along his neck, kissing, biting, sucking little red spots all over. Listening to the wet sounds and their moans intermingling between their mouths as they shared a kiss. The second finger was less kind than the first, the dull ache making Rin tense and his face twist in displeasure. Sousuke slowed his fingers, his hand dropping from his dick to fondle his balls, rolling them together tenderly.

 

Rin choked out a groan, breathing in Sousuke, feeling Sousuke all around him. Nuzzling his face into Sousuke’s neck, rolling his hips against Sousuke, the skin painfully dry between them. Without thinking he grabbed the lube, covering his hand before slipping it between them, taking hold of Sousuke. The angle was awkward, but the voice gasping in his ears and the thrusts against his back spurred him on.

 

Before he knew it he had his hands wrapped around Sousuke’s, cumming into his hand, legs shaking and moaning into his mouth, the fingers moving inside him slow and deliberate, riding out his orgasm. Winded, a lifeless Rin let his legs fall against the bed, pleasure pulsating through his body, Sousuke whispering sweet nothings to him as he pulled out of Rin, wiping his fingers against their already dirtied sheets and wrapping his arms around him.

 

“Feel good?”

 

“Yeah,” Rin said after a moment, eyes heavy as he opened them. “When’d you think up that?”

 

“I just thought it’d be easy if I did it like I normally would,” Sousuke said shrugging, moving Rin in his lap. Rin froze for a second, mouth in a tight line.

 

“What do you mean by normally?” Rin said, sitting up, scooting away. Sousuke said nothing, and the atmosphere went rigid, turning to him Rin saw something akin to embarrassment and shame. “I thought this was a first for us both.”

 

“Huh?” Sousuke said, brows scrunching. “Yeah, of course it—wait. Wait did you think I meant like I’ve done it with other people before?”

 

“Then what the hell did you mean!” Rin said, crossing his arms over his chest, holding himself close.

 

“I meant when I do it by myself!” Sousuke said, voice a little louder, face red. “What the hell—I can’t believe you’d think, think that I’d lie to you,” Sousuke continued, and Rin’s shoulders dropped as he realized his mistake.

 

“Sousuke that’s not—I just, sorry,” Rin said with a sigh, extending a hand to the other. Sousuke looked at it with a cautious glare before letting his hand slide against Rin’s. Rin curled his fingers around Sousuke’s, glancing up at him and feeling guilt when he saw the embarrassment and clear sadness pooling in those eyes.

 

“You just assume things all the time,” Sousuke whispered, squeezing Rin’s hand. “What does it mean, that you think I’d lie to you instead of believing I’d do something like—like that for you. That I’d be trying that stuff out because I want to be like that with you, Rin.”

 

His breath stuttered, and he felt like such a fool, staring at their hands, resting on the bed. Unable to meet Sousuke’s gaze. “I’m sorry. I know it’s not much of an excuse, but I just thought,” he mumbled, “because all those books at that store, and those magazines. Even on forums a lot of people say shit and I just thought you wouldn’t want to.”

 

“What the hell,” Sousuke said, letting go of Rin’s hand. “Who cares what they have to say—we won’t know until we try, and here you are deciding everything for us before it even happens. What if I told you I’ve been thinking about this for a long time now? What would you say to that?”

 

Rin’s eyes snapped to his, shock loosening his jaw as he saw Sousuke retreat into himself. Not allowing it, Rin surged forward, pulling Sousuke into a bone crushing hug. “Have you?” His hands trembled, cheeks growing hot as he thought about it. “Have you really? Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

“It’s embarrassing Rin, and you never mentioned feeling the same. What did you want me to do? Come out and just tell you ‘hey, I know this is out of nowhere, but I’ve been imagining you fucking me for awhile now so want to try it out?’” Sousuke sneered, though his arms came to hug him loosely. “We haven’t even gotten that far yet, everything is still so new. I didn’t know when was the right time to bring it up—or how to bring it up at all.”

 

Rin nodded into his shoulder, eyes wide with shock as he took in Sousuke’s words, rubbing circles in his back, feeling at ease when Sousuke tightened his hold, pulling Rin forward until they could hug properly. The silence around them eased into a comfortable one, both listening to each other’s breath and heartbeat, holding each other close. Rin pulled back, adoration filling him as he saw those sad puppy-dog eyes staring at him, kissing the frown right off the other's lips.

 

“So,” Rin said between kisses, sighing when Sousuke’s hand tangled itself in his hair. “How do we do this?”

 

“You don’t have to,” Sousuke said, eyes fluttering closed as Rin leaned in for another kiss.

 

“I want to,” Rin hummed against his lips. “I want to, so tell me what to do.”

 

Sousuke leaned back against the pillows again, pulling Rin up onto his lap. “Just let me finish getting ready.”

 

“You started?” Rin asked, catching the wording as he trailed kisses along Sousuke’s jawline and down to his shoulder.

 

“When I was in the shower. I wasn’t sure if anything would come of it, but I thought,” Sousuke said with a shrug. Rin got up onto his knees, the strangled noise of the bottle being squeezed more filling the air. Sousuke slipped his hand between them, Rin flinching when Sousuke brushed against him, still sensitive.

 

Rin let his hands wander the expanse of Sousuke’s muscles, admiring each dip of his abs, the perfect tan skin under his palms, rising with each breath. Dark wiry hair brushing against the pad of his fingers as he dipped a little lower, sucking a perfect purple bruise just behind Sousuke’s ear. Picking up a leg and maneuvering himself to sit between Sousuke’s thighs again, his gaze fell, heat pooling at the base of his stomach.

 

Watching Sousuke’s fingers enter himself was hard, the angle a little strange, but now he could see everything. See his knuckles get sucked in around tight muscle. His body itched just watching it, his dick twitching, the arousal almost painful. Rin swore his whole body was blushing as he watched it, listened to it. Curiosity getting the best of him he let a finger slide across that stuffed entrance, breath hitching as he saw Sousuke tense. Looking up he saw Sousuke wasn’t looking at him, but at the wall, a stubborn blush crawling across his chest and the top of his shoulders.

 

Rin let the pad of his finger slide against it again, palming his erection, trying to alleviate the sensitive nerves. He bit his lip when Sousuke pulled his fingers out, the gaping hole looked so delicious his pulse thundered in his ears. Before he could think any further his hand was being tugged forward by Sousuke’s. Rin looked back up at him, seeing Sousuke’s eyes on him now, a short nod, giving permission without needing to be asked. Trying to focus his hazy eyes, he let Sousuke guide him inside, the sudden heat surrounding his finger unbearable.

 

It felt so different from when he was doing it to himself, so much warmer, scalding, even. Rin lost his breath thinking about being inside that heat, that pressure. Sousuke chuckled then, startling him. Questions in his eyes as Sousuke leaned up and kissed him. Pulling Rin’s fingers back out, Sousuke grabbed the condoms they had set aside. The first try was not very graceful, hard to rip open with lube slick fingers, and fumbling putting it on.

 

The second time was more successful, Rin pulling it down snug around his base, breathing heavy in anticipation. He was excited, yes, but he was also afraid. Afraid of hurting Sousuke, afraid of doing something wrong. He had read about it so much but now that it was happening he felt so unprepared. Sousuke rubbed his now half-hard member with more lube, Rin holding the condom in place just to be sure. His nerves never felt so abused, and it was intoxicating. What had felt like too much now making him ache for more.

 

Sousuke turned around, getting on his knees, a silent question in his eyes, wondering if Rin was okay to go through with it. Rin flattened himself against him, holding him close and giving his cheek a firm kiss. He loosened his grip as Sousuke bent forward, putting a hand against the wall and another against Rin’s hip.

 

“Slowly,” Sousuke said, Rin nodding though the other could not see. Rin put a hand on Sousuke’s cheek, spreading him just a little as he lined himself up, breath caught as he pressed the tip against his entrance. It felt like it was impossible, that it wouldn’t go in. Sousuke leaned into the touch and Rin reared back on instinct. “Rin, you have to actually try putting it in,” Sousuke said, amusement in his voice.

 

“What if it’s too much?” Rin asked. “It felt like I was already pressing too hard.”

 

“I’ll tell you if it’s too much,” Sousuke said, reaching back and pulling Rin’s wrist to him, holding his hand. “Try again. I’ll squeeze when you need to stop.”

 

“Okay,” Rin whispered, staring down at the daunting task once more before lining himself up and leaning in. His heart jumped into his throat when the tip entered inside, the pressure stronger than he thought it’d be. Sousuke gasped in front of him, but his hand was still loose around his, and there were no signs of his shoulders tensing.

 

Rin felt like he couldn’t breathe, let alone say anything as he began to push forward again, slow and persistent. So slow his legs quaked as he tried to control himself, sliding into that heat was too much. When he was in halfway Sousuke gave a squeeze, and Rin halted, resting his head between Sousuke’s shoulder blades.

 

“Sousuke,” he moaned. “This is crazy.”

 

“I know,” Sousuke said, voice rough as he controlled his breathing. “How do you feel?”

 

“Amazing,” Rin groaned, rubbing his sweaty forehead against Sousuke’s back. “But that’s not important, what about you?”

 

“It’s weird, but it doesn’t feel bad,” Sousuke said with a laugh, both groaning at the motion. “It’s not what I expected.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

Sousuke didn’t say anything for a moment, before his hand left Rin’s and settled just below his stomach. “I can feel you,” Sousuke said before dropping his hand and putting both against the wall. “I don’t know, it's stupid. It’s just, hot, and I can feel you inside me. I don’t know how else to explain it. It’s like I can feel your pulse.”

 

Rin’s knees buckled a little, heart aching with love. Sousuke moaned, hands shooting back to help hold Rin against him. Rin cursed, trying to regain control over his legs, steading himself, but then Sousuke was pulling him closer and he could do nothing but fall into him, hips shaking against him as the rest of his length was sucked inside.

 

“Sousuke,” Rin moaned, “what should I do?”

 

“Let me move,” Sousuke said, rocking his hips slowly. Rin nodded, licking and kissing up Sousuke’s spine as the other moved them in a gentle rhythm.

 

“Love you,” Rin mouthed against the warm skin under him. “Love you, Sousuke, I love you so much.”

 

“Rin.”

 

Rin grabbed hold of Sousuke’s leaking member, knowing what he wanted to say but felt too embarrassed to ask for. Sousuke moved a little harder than, fucking himself back onto Rin and into Rin’s hand at a slow and deliberate pace that was melting Rin’s mind. He felt like all reason was leaving him as he tried to hold on, on to Sousuke, on to reality. He felt the pressure inside increase slowly and Sousuke moaned, loud and free before covering his mouth.

 

“Faster Rin,” Sousuke said, and Rin tried his best to keep the rhythm of his hand steady, trying his best to follow Sousuke’s requests, but every shallow slide back inside Sousuke had Rin’s mind going blank. Rin shifted, trying to get a better angle as he felt himself sliding back on the bed sheets, a deep guttural sound escaping Sousuke, his head hanging and his hand against his mouth. Rin felt the twitching of Sousuke’s member in his hand and gave everything had to getting Sousuke off then, crying out as the walls around him spasmed around him, a second orgasm ripped out of him as Sousuke cried out his name.

 

Unable to take it Rin grabbed the condom and pulled out, as slow as he could manage, noticing Sousuke wince before they both collapsed against the bed. Rin felt like his soul had been sucked out of him. He turned his head to look at Sousuke, eyes closed and breathing hard, a small pool of drool against the pillow. He had a hand covering where Rin had just been, small spurts dribbling out of the head of Sousuke’s dick and falling to the bed sheets below. Arousal hit him with a twang and he groaned, grimacing. It was too much. Sitting up he removed the condom and tied it off, tossing it into the wastebasket.

 

“Sorry about that,” a raspy voice said next to him. Rin looked, seeing Sousuke looking at him from his half-fetal position. Rin followed the gaze of his eyes down to his own crotch, dick an angry red, drained, limp against him.

 

“I think I should be thanking you actually,” Rin said, laughing. “But maybe that was a little too soon to go again.”

 

“I’ll remember that for next time,” Sousuke laughed, turning and flopping onto his side, groaning. “That was amazing.”

 

“Don’t sugar coat it,” Rin said, “it was amazing for me, yeah. But seriously, how did it feel? Are you okay?”

 

“I’m good. It was good,” Sousuke said, looking at him with an unguarded smile, “great, actually. I mean yeah, some parts definitely hurt, you moved a little too fast after you first got inside.”

 

“Shit, really?” Rin said, a frown on his lips.

 

“Don’t worry, you stopped yourself when I asked,” Sousuke said with a laugh, crossing his arms over his eyes. “Thanks.”

 

“For what?” Rin asked, turning to fully face him, a hand resting on Sousuke’s stomach.

 

“I don’t know,” Sousuke said with a laugh, dropping his arms and giving Rin a bright smile. His own lips pulled back in response, both chuckling before pulling each other into another hug, laughing at their twin grunts in pain as they moved. Rin curled himself around Sousuke, feeling much like he could never love someone as much as he loved the one right there in his arms.

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr Post](http://meloncitrus.tumblr.com/post/176497455316/fumbling-firsts-meloncitrus-grandmelon-free)   
>  [Twitter Post](https://twitter.com/melon_citrus/status/1024439541699100675)


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